Few days ago Tauseeq Haider interviewed Dr. Enver Sajjad. As is Dr. Enver's usual demeanor--irresistible! You have to listen to the man. The man talks and talks sense. He says things the way they are. No fluff. No sugar coating. The plain, cold, simple truth. And so it came as no surprise when he just slammed the facts on the table and said "....there are only 2 'species' that are rapidly becoming popular these days: actors and anchors. No one remembers the writers and directors any more."

It got me thinking about these anchors he was referring to. And the ones that immediately came to mind were the annoying ones. The ones I watch on TV and wonder how big of a safarish they must have paid to be where they are now. They have no talent whatsoever....no skill of their craft....and except for one qualification: talking (read "talking total bs")---it seems based solely on that and the fact they pulled some major strings to get where they are......hence it had to be a safarish.

1. Ayesha Sana: Please for the love of god, get your nasal problem fixed and stop snorting back your post-nasal drip when you talk to your guests.

2. Shaista Wahidi: Lady, kissing a snake on its mouth on live tv isn't gonna boost your ratings. And please learn to sit!

3. VJ Waqar: You're a wanna-be. Your "ideas" for different shows aren't really worth watching. And by the way, the long hair doesn't do much for you either. Basically the guy tries to make his idiocy under the spotlight appealing. So far, it hasn't worked. Not everyone is Letterman.

4. Some VJ on ATV: Don't know the dude's name...but god he sucks at hosting a show!!! Rarely has a clue as to what he wants to say. And after being on the show pretty much EVERYDAY--still hasn't learned which camera to look into.

5. Sahir Lodhi: I want to like you.....but just can't bring myself to it. You seem to have a good sense of perspective...but then sometimes you say things that make me wonder if the wheels really are turning. I'll give you this much, you're slightly better than your sister. But if you wouldn't try so hard, you might be more pleasant to watch.

6. Hamid Mir: Can't waste my time.

7. Farah Hussain: She's the cold statue that talks for 2 hrs straight in the morning. May be if she brought some human expression and emotion, she would look.......ummm...........human!?

8. Abeel Jawed: Desi blonde.

9. Mubashir Lucman: You not only try too hard, but you also aren't as intelligent as you want your viewers to believe.

What's with the desi mentality?!

Someone please enlighten me. And if you share the same sentiment, then join the club!

But, first, a disclaimer: I'm not on the outside looking in....I'm very much IN and among them--which is why my observation is so pristine and right on the mark. But despite being amongst them, I'm still failing to understand why their mentality is messed up.

Now for the specifics. The "mentality" I'm referring to is this weird vitriol that detonates from them every time you build a certain expectation. And the most common expectation (and for those of you who are wondering the same question as me are then all too familiar with what I'm about to say) is when it comes to the scenario of ''helping''. You know what I'm talking about.....you're not exactly looking for help nor asking for it, but nevertheless they insist they can help you with whatever it is you're going through. And despite the fact that you decline and say "no, it's ok"....they keep insisting. So, in the end, you accept---thinking perhaps it would be a good thing if you got a helping hand. But that's exactly when you've fallen into the trap. When the time comes, the curtains raise, and the drumroll ceases.........there's......nothing. Nada. Zilch. They've either vanished and will say they never remembered that they had offered to help. Or, (and this is the most common reaction) turn things around and throw it back at you saying you're expecting too much out of them. And that is the '' weird vitriol'' I'm talking about. Then, not only are you left without help but now you also stand wondering what the hell just happened. Just moments ago they seemed so amicable and willing, and now you're being accused of asking too much out of them!!??

My bottomline is: why can't we help one another?? what's up with that? what do we lose by helping the other person out? and if we can't help one another, then why do you offer to begin with? why not just say, up front, "hey! ...I don't think I can." ?? no one is gonna take a plunge at you for that! honesty really is the best policy. SO FOR GOD'S SAKE JUST SAY IT! and stop mincing your words!

I only expected something out of you, CUZ YOU INSISTED ON IT. So please just someone explain to me what the hell these desis are up to?

Meanwhile, I think I've learned my lesson one too many times: I'm not trusting desis anymore.