Get a Life!

I've had enough of Facebook! And more than that, I've had enough of the people who use it!! Despite the fact that so many have written about their anti-Facebook sentiments....I want to vent my disgust for it as well. And perhaps I wouldn't have cared to write about this if it wasn't for a friend who carelessly commented one day that I was living under a rock. (We weren't close to begin with, so in all honesty I could care less what she thought).

I've embraced everything out there that is 'new' and 'recent'. But, my choice to avoid the Facebook mayhem (yes, it is a mayhem...I'll explain later) is not a result of being backward or rebelling against social trends, but quite simply I don't feel there is an imperative need for me to acquaint with 300 virtual no-bodies and call them "friends" and then sit back and 'poke' one another. As for the mayhem--yes, I believe it is a needless and willful damage of.....privacy. But what I want to know is, why? Why do you want total strangers staring at you and knowing about every detail of your life? Let me translate that into real life: would you be ok if someone came up to you out of nowhere and asked to be your friend and then proceeded to ask you who you were friends with, what you did on Saturday nights, where you work, etc etc. Would it be ok if this person followed you everywhere you went? Common sense demands that you would avoid such a person. Then why put yourself up for this on the internet? And that is essentially what's happening. You've given a horde of people front-row seats to the blow by blow of your life. And the height of this absurdity is that when they get to see or read something that you, in hindsight, wished they hadn't, you begin to freak out. To me, this equates to tearing down the doors and windows of your house so everyone gets a first-hand look......after all, isn't that what you're doing when you 'update your status'?? Especially those who feel compelled to do it literally EVERY MINUTE OF THEIR BREATHING LIFE!!

But back to the users of this online obsession that's turning into madness. My repulsion began when I saw what Facebook was doing to that friend of mine. She developed an urgency equal in magnitude to that of going to the bathroom to pee and not finding an empty stall. She was about to pop! Her impending need to see her Facebook page and that of others needed to be fulfilled instantly it seemed, otherwise, she was pretty much close to passing out. And this is no exaggeration when I say she quite nearly resembled an addict who needed their next shot to maintain their high. So, she had in effect become the Facebook junkie. Once she was logged in and saw who had written on her wall and got to write some of her own comments as well, and saw who was hanging out with who at last night's party, and who did what, only then did relief spread over her face. But, what I found irritating was how out of her nearly 110 friends, she only knew 8....the rest were just people. And how she felt she HAD to know what was going on with everyone else at that very moment or else........!! Why not just pick up the phone and call? (They all live in the same town!) And as for some of the friends she 'kind-of knew but not really well', she took the liberty of commenting on their pictures and looks without discretion. How rude! I mean first of all, you hardly know the person, then you go beyond limits to say whatever you want......but I guess, it does all come around eventually because, quite logically, there are people out there staring at your picture and doing the same! And then of course, there are the pictures and profiles of people you don't even know in person and just met online. Why do you care to know what they're up to when there's every possibility that whatever they're saying and doing could very easily be fake?? And that is my other problem with Facebook: although there may be many accurate profiles, there is also a huge possibility that a lot of those profiles are made-up and you can be anyone you want to be. Which brings me to one of my best friend's comment: Facebook is the sanctuary for the losers and loners out there who had no one to talk to and no place to go. Buddy! I'm beginning to believe you!

Isn't it a lot more fun and interesting to GO OUT and run into potential friends, instead of sitting in front of a phosphorescent screen editing and updating a page all day? Now many will argue, that most members' list of friends is of people they already know.....but I know for a fact that there is a vast majority whose list consists of people they met entirely online and have no clue whatsoever of what these people are like in real life. And to have these people gawk at you, read and comment on what you're doing is creepy, to say the least. Secondly, why is there such a pressure to join? This cult-like attitude is not very appealing. Just because "everyone is on it and so should you" isn't a very convincing reason for me to join in. I'm told "it's a great way to stay in touch".....well, I'm already in touch with the people I need to be in touch with, and we do that just fine through phone and meeting IN PERSON! And that's the other thing: why do I need to re-connect with people from the past? Don't you get it? They're 'people from the past'.....if I wanted to be in touch with them, they'd be people of the present! The fact that they're in the past means I want to keep them there! Not interested in getting back in touch.

My hatred was intensified recently when I read Farhad Manjoo's column in Slate on how joining Facebook is the equivalent of having antiperspirant. Body odor can be a menace, and not having deodorant can put you in a compromising situation; but, not having someone to 'poke' every 10 minutes isn't exactly going to be embarrassing....no matter how urgent the need. Telling me that Facebook is right up there with toothpaste, deodorant and cell phones shows me just how deluded you've all become and you need to get out and breathe in some fresh air! He goes on to say that as more people join Facebook, the more useful it becomes for everyone. Useful? There's email if I need to get in touch with someone on the other side of the world. There are phones too. And if we need to network to find other people for whatever reasons we all come together and do it efficiently. But, this insanity that Facebook is nurturing that you all need to know what the other one is doing AT ALL TIMES is crazy, and that this is the best aid for social interaction---well, not for me! For me, there is nothing useful about Facebook. It's an absolute waste of time on the most useless of social trends. If 'useful' is to be used in the context of Facebook, then I'm sorry to say it can't be done. You're not doing anything useful at all. And don't feed me the crap about how it helps you to be connected with people and find others who you would have never thought of finding.....this can ALL be done if you log off and step outside for just one day. There's no convenience to it either. It's just as 'convenient' to find people and all that mumbo jumbo if you put some effort into it and leave the premise of your couch. Facebook is quite simply fostering the idea of convenience because you 'connect' to people while you sit in your favorite PJs on your comfy chair in the confines of your room. And that is what all these loners have morphed into: hermits!

So while Mark Zuckerberg celebrated his 150 millionth Facebook member on Jan. 8 and marks it as a milestone, I can only say one thing: I'm glad I know the way out of my room and out to the driveway where I get into my car and drive over to the best place in town known for its desserts, and hang out with my friends under the sun enjoying the spring weather, while you facebook junkies sit crammed in that chair fervently typing and clicking on 'View profile'.